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What do you do when you feel like your financial advisor practice is stuck?

As a coach of financial Advisors, I get asked this question quite often. I will tell my clients to push back from the table and ask yourself a hard question: What has me believe my business is stuck? Is your … Continue reading

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“the death of the illuso…

“the death of the illusory self creates the space for the true self to step forward. When we are beyond attachment we begin to see the world as it really is.”

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Why must we do hard things? By Ken Doyle

 

As some of my writing may reveal I truly believe that the laziest way is the best way to achieve your goal. So what is the laziest way to grow your business? Ironically it takes work to grow a business and often the most effective way is the hardest but does not take the most effort. That is a bit of a mind twister but let me see if I can unfold that truth for you. What is the laziest way to become a great writer? To go to Oxford and study literature and perhaps get your PHD in writing and then teach creative writing and then after you are duly qualified you sit down to write a book? That sounds like a ton of work a lot of study and peer review and breaking down sentences and studying iambic pentameter and that stuff. That sounds like at least a good ten years of preparing yourself to write. In the immortal words of Stephen Pressfield that is all about “resistance the getting ready to get ready”. The lazy way would simply begin to write. If you wrote consistently for ten years you would write a ton of crap but in that load of crap would be some great stuff! The hardest part about writing according to Pressfield and I back up his statement is not the writing itself it’s the sitting down to write. The hardest part is getting to the plate to swing at the ball! I also see this in my other manifestation of life being my coaching practice: the hardest thing for me to do is to make the call to a prospect/suspect not the talking to the prospect/suspect. I wonder why that is? Do you do the same stuff? My theory is that I am dancing in the land of Mickey Mouse up to the time the other person answers the phone. The Land of Mickey Mouse is the same place that the boogie man lives, the person who hides behind my fence comes from, the creep who stalks me after I watch a scary movie and all the women who turn their heads and ogle me when I walk into a room. It’s called the land of imagination. Yep, its all in my head and often that conversation in my head can win and the more that it wins the stronger or more natural that conversation becomes. Hence the reason we need to do hard things the laziest way possible.

 

Being lazy has a bad rap in our culture. If we apply logic we can see that being lazy and still producing the desired result is actually quite brilliant. What would you rather do make 100,000 in an hour or 100,000 in a year? Which one is more effective? Which way is the really lazy way? I mean if we define lazy as being sloth like? That is right working all year to make a 100k is quite inefficient and ineffective.

 

So why must we do hard things if we are committed to being lazy? By doing hard things it allows us to more efficiently lazy or dare I say effective? Now I may be mixing metaphors everywhere and creating great confusion amongst my readers (thanks for reading Mom!) and perhaps the writer as well but hopefully I will get somebody to think somewhere at some time. This is one of the huge benefits of writing a rough, rough draft I do not have to know exactly where this is going but the rice will cook.

 

Back to why Hard Things? Because they are hard, plain and simple as that. If as a kid you had two paths to take: the hard path and the easy path which path would have served you the best? Lets say the hard path would be studying, getting good grades, competing in sports, working your way through school and in general staying out of trouble and then the easy path: who cares about grades, lets party, lets smoke weed, screw sports and extracurricular activities, “I just want to do what I want to do when I feel like doing it” screw college. You probably know people who took that easy path and how did that work out for them? I know you did not take that path because if you did you would not be reading this. A friend of mine who is a Champion Football Coach instills in his players that what really matters is character and mental toughness. How does one cultivate these traits: by doing hard things? What is your other option if you choose not to do hard things?

 

If you do not do hard things then by default you are doing easy things. What is the easy thing to do? The things that you have already mastered! The easiest thing for you to do is to keep doing what you have already done. What is the predictable future if you keep doing the same things that you have already done? Sameness is the predictable future otherwise known as BOREDOM.

 

There is nothing wrong with boredom but there is a predictable future to it: SELF DESTRUCTION. I will submit that no one chooses with consciousness to be bored. It’s something that happens under the radar. I highly doubt that you have ever said to yourself: “Self, today is the day that we are going to be absolutely bored out of our minds. We are going to hate our lives, our selves, our neighbors our everything, nothing will be good enough and nothing will please us. Today is the day that we will doubt the reason and purpose of our existence.” If you did this shit consciously I would say awesome go take it on be BORED whole-heartedly but since you did not do it clawed its way into your world somehow by different levels of inadvertence.

 

Why SELF DESTRUCTION? It’s very entertaining to your mind! It will give you massive problems to solve by default instead of design. Your mind was built to solve hard problems and if you are not courageous enough to give it hard problems to solve it will create monster problems for you! Why? Because your soul wants you to do hard things, your soul wants you to achieve to suck the marrow out of existence for it realizes this time in the vividness of existence is fleeting.

 

SELF DESTRUCTION is awesome but painful and messy. Well let me word that a little differently: the death of the illusory self creates the space for the true self to step forward. When we are beyond attachment we begin to see the world as it really is. In the business world I frame this as the game that can never be won only played. It’s the playing that matters not the winning because there is no winning in the game of business only playing. Real life examples, Donald Trump, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerburg, Warren Buffet etc all of these immortals have won the game I think being a billionaire qualifies as winning yet they are all still playing the game? Why didn’t they just cut the cord become Buddhist monks, collect sea shells in Costa Rica or begin building houses for the homeless or travel around the world for 23 years? All of those options are viable for someone with a billion dollars but why do they continue to play the game of business? They enjoy doing hard things!!! Because they intrinsically know that if they were not doing hard things they would be doing easy things which would make them bored and from boredom comes self destruction. SELF DESTRUCTION has many names: affairs, drug or alcohol abuse, physical or mental abuse, resentment, excessive eating, pornography, gossip, helicopter parenting, projecting yourself on your kids and various other forms of weirdness. All of this is probably encompassed in the 7 Deadly Sins now that could be a fun essay the: 7 deadly sins the keys to self destruction which then leads to enlightenment. The world wants you to evolve and to evolve you will need to do Hard Things or embrace Self Destruction I submit the outcome will be roughly the same. It’s like the distinction between taking the hard path or the easy path. When you take the hard path your life eventually becomes easy. When you take the easy path your life eventually becomes hard. By doing hard things it will help you transcend the illusion of your identity to embrace higher levels of existence. The same is available on the path of self destruction. When the alcoholic finally admits that he has a problem after he has lost everything in his world he then needs to redefine who he believes him self to be his false self is dead. If we take the path of the drug addict or alcoholic back to the beginning or anyone else embracing SELF DESTRUCTION  they first imbibed because they were bored from failing to choose to do the hard things so they took the easy path and way lead onto way….

 

Ken Doyle

www.gettingresultscoaching.com

 

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Increased production for your team the how to guide by Ken Doyle

Are incentives in alignment with compensation? Are you paying you people appropriate to the actions you want them to take? Why is it in your employee’s best interest to go above and beyond his everyday actions? This is a great … Continue reading

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